Friday, January 1, 2016


I know it's been quite a while since I last updated.  A lot has been going on and I've wanted to write, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.  But I am determined that this year I am going to more consistently write.  So, I'm starting the year off on the right foot!

New Year's is one of my favorite times of the year.  I love the newness of it.  I love looking ahead at the year and seeing a blank slate.  Knowing that I have the power to determine how it will be filled.  I love the fresh start that it brings, the chance to set new goals.  In the past I have made a list of several goals that I want to accomplish in the new year.  These goals ranged from reading a certain number of books to eating healthy to writing a certain number of letters each month.  While making goals like this can be a good thing, several years ago I stopped making goals.  Instead, I chose one word to focus on for the whole year.  This word drives my goal setting.  It helps me focus on an idea rather than something I have to do.  It's not something I can perfect so I don't feel like such a failure when I forget. 

Several months ago, God brought a word to my mind and I instantly knew it would be my word for 2016.  The word is joy.  Honestly, joy is something I have not experienced a lot of lately. 

When we first moved to New Mexico I was full of excitement over all the new things we were going to do and place we were exploring.  I didn't mind all of the time home alone with the kids.  But after a while I started to sink into monotony.  First I got bored, then I got frustrated and discouraged.  I stopped making the most of my time and instead gave in to self-pity.  I wasn't finding joy in my family and I wasn't doing things that brought me joy.  And things got worse and worse.  I was so focused on myself and how much I miss my friends and family at home that I was missing out on the wonderful things that are right here in front of me.  I'm sure this is all a normal part of adjusting to such a drastic move, but it's not how I want to live my life.

So I have decided to choose joy.  Instead of focusing on all that I miss about our old life "back home," I'm going to focus on the wonderful new experiences I have here.  I'm going to stop worrying about all the things I "should" be doing and start spending more time doing the things that bring me joy.  Things like reading.  And writing.  Baking.  Playing games.  I will never be okay with my husband being gone 11 hours every day, but I get to choose how I spend that time with my children.  I'm going to spend it doing things that I enjoy.  Coloring with them.  Doing puzzles.  Going on adventures.

Joy is a choice.  I get to choose my attitude.  I'm not saying that it's going to be easy.  I know that some days will end in a big pity part.  And that's okay because I will give myself grace.  But I don't want to miss out on this time that I have.  I want to have fun and enjoy this life that I've been given.  I want to laugh more.  And I am looking forward to seeing all that 2016 has in store for me.

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